The Formula for a Traveler's Heart

Airplanes going to and from the starting points and the final destinations of many travelers leave the unfortunate residing on the solid earth longing for more. School children stop mesmerized at an aircraft so colossal, new possibilities shine like iridescent glitters on a lifeless metal frame. From across the pond, areas on opposite sides present themselves to shimmer like unopened toys on Christmas day, waiting to be discovered. It lures us in. Seducing our every being. It is luxury so indescribable, yet so frightening and foreboding. What makes us hold back, or better yet, who holds us back from venturing elsewhere? With the mindset of a nomad, yet the outlook of a child...we can be our own worst enemy by revert back into a foreign state of mind. Going forth is only an idea, but what is that one driving force that gets us moving? The answer: a vagabond's heart. The never ending sky, the only friend in plain sight, can be an inviting afterglow of fear as well. It haunts...and in some way...always reminds us of what we want to explore in our lifetime but gives us no direction to take. Se la vie!

Won By One

You broke through my wall with a hammer so powerful; I witnessed the sound barrier shatter before my eyes. Echoes reverberating off the walls of my heart kept reminding me of all the insecurities you destroyed in me.

It was a war won by one. It was my battle, but you gained victory.

You flung the fears that laid deep inside of me completely out of my body. Blood permeated everywhere - over the vicious and fallen. The incubus was brutally slaughtered with no breathe residing inside its departed shell. I laid helpless - fragile as a child - praying to God this was not Hell. I was stoned...utterly terrified of what would have been an alternate ending if you did not save the last of me.

It was a war won by one. It was my mental battle, but you let the sunlight in.

Captivating my consciousness, you will perpetually be admired as my hero.

The Spy Vs. The Supernatural

The moon, rusted with a sanguine color, crooked its menacing smile directly at the woman's face reminding her of the deeds she has done. She missed him. Longing for him day after day. She never thought the words of "love" would creep their way into her thoughts, but they somehow worked their way in. She continues to fall for this man every night she is not by his side...falling so deeply. A slight lust for him was all she held to be true up until that very moment she finally exhaled. Driving with eyes fixed on the road and hands firmly wrapped around the steering wheel, the woman trembled below her seat belt. She murmured sighs of discomfort and released tears deep from her being and out of her bloodshot red eyes. Her nerves grew unsettling by the minute...she had to pull herself together. She was drifting onto her right lane unknowingly. Now, more so then ever, she genuinely felt God laid this wonderful man in her path to finally present to her the true agape that she has been yearning for. The seeker is unmoving, and forever more unconditionally in love.

Side By Side: Wayne Coyne

Me & Wayne Coyne. 2011.

Sitting side by side next to the man who gave life to my favorite songs is extremely overwhelming. Next to Wayne Coyne, lead singer from The Flaming Lips, I was utterly stoned to the core fathoming to concept of how honored I was to take up some of his time talking about love, the marriage of life and death, and the incessant cycle of human wonder. For some fans, it seems as though it is but a distant dream. For me, by some sort of sheer luck, I was able to meet Wayne after the "Dark Side Of The Moon" concert on the 15th of June and be personally invited by him backstage. While talking to him, he confessed to singling me out of the crowd and singing the second verse of "She Don't Use Jelly" to me. Feeling incredibly flattered and the blood rush to my cheeks...I had to give this jolly, eccentric 50 year old, singer/songwriter a hug!

Me, Andy Dick, & Wayne Coyne.

One of his stage crew members gave me the set list for that night of the concert which he took in to his own hands and personally autographed. Oddly enough, while me and Wayne were talking about the night, Andy Dick appears out from the shadows of the stage and joins in. Epic.

Backstage, me and Wayne sat and continued talking. Laughter filled the air. "This is what life is all about," said Wayne, "you have to take advantage of every moment you get. Seize the moment! We have one life to live before death takes it away from us. If we don't live fully, then we could never be truly content with ourselves." I finally knew what he was trying to convey to me all along. Minutes went by, and still we sat. "I don't want to continue taking up all of your time. I know all these other people are here to talk to you as well," I said out of respect. Wayne gently put his hand on my knee an said in a soft endearing voice, "Don't worry. Your not taking up any of my time." We smiled. Pictures were taken and then goodbyes were finally said after a couple more minutes of inspirational talk.

Wayne singing "Money"
by Pink Floyd.

If I had the chance, once more, to converse with Wayne again, I would thank him for all that he told me. At that moment, I knew the spark had finally bled.

Thanks Wayne.

Normal Childhood Nightmare

When you turn on a light in the bedroom,

objects around you appear in tact...but the grotesque

thriving in the depths your fear will never cease to ignore you.

The innocence in your heart keeps the monster only wanting more.

With age,

the demons grow

immensely, haunting

you at every moment you have

alone. As a child remains frightened

of the bone chilling goblins seen only on Halloween,

the problem presents itself

quite clear to see...we find ourselves

trapped in a world scarier then any childhood 

nightmare we have ever fathomed

to encounter.

Broken Microwave

Sister, it has become such an ugly tragedy

when you find yourself destroying a lonesome machine,

in the sanctum of a kitchen.

No one could believe it.

Breaking the microwave

brings a rush of tears to my eyes.

How can I heat my freezer food?

It's all raw.

Cooking on the stove top makes no sense at all.

Happened so unexpectedly.

Feeling so chemically attached to something that's gone.

Catching a butterfly,

then having it fly away,

only brings me to say one thing,

"Hold on forever and love those

you never thought you could love.

Don't let them brake on you."

The empire could fall at any time

and you will feel that bond to something that's forgotten.

Fate Has A Funny Way (Short Story Intro)

In the beginning, the world was but an empty void. Full of darkness. Full of chaos. Nothing emerged out of its grip. Love was an unknown variable. Hate was never alive. It was an existence based on pure absence. Oblivion in which everything was perceived to be fictitious. Reality was but a dream, dreamt by fools and the Gods. Nature was motionless and uninvolved with man. Neither God nor Satan could ever explain what went wrong in the beginning. Life was cold. Dead. The cycle was corrupt until the day that purgatory finally ended. The sky was painted sepia. Heat was formed and created some sort of divine light. The reign of darkness was shattered. Eyes saw for the first time the beauty of being human...

After half a decade, Daryl never knew the life he once fathomed in his dreams and established from scratch would all fade away.

Now, planting his feet on the concrete in the same faded blue jeans he wore the previous day, Daryl contemplated the start of his new found loneliness. He stood there in dismay in the middle of a thunder storm watching the love of his life slip from his arms. Daryl was never a man of raw emotion but at that moment his knees trembled and his eyes teared but there was no movement towards the now estranged woman. Change slithered its way, like a snake in the grass, in between the 36 year old man and his fiancee. Confused as hell, he tried to think of the catalyst that brought his beautiful Zoe to the final solution of their separation.